Undercover Over-Lover 5/30

You can't tell
And sometimes neither can I
I stay in disguise
Can hardly tell between truth and lie

I'm undercover
A cop
A blue-collar
A pig

But for all intents and purposes
What lies beneath the surface
Of me
And my thoughts
Is him
And my emotions

You see I'm undercover
But I'm not a real cop
No
I'm an undercover overlover

Wait.
Allow me to explain
You see I love passionately
Tenderly
Sexually
Lustfully
Cautiously
Intellectually
Emotionally
Spiritually
And unfortunately.....
Sorta redundantly

I'm a china dish
Delicate and dainty
And also
Breakable and expensive

So I go undercover
Disguise myself
Make myself plastic
Unbreakable
With a tupperware feel
Cheap, even

Can't get hurt so easily
Won't break
The shards of glass that makes up my natural exterior
Are underwraps
Bubblewrapped
Unseen

But its all a lie
I'm an undercover over-lover

I love so hard I hurt myself
Eventually break myself
And as a result
Lose a part of myself

Cuz China's only so strong
Even if put in a tupperware costume
There comes a time where the faux exterior falls

Temporary Distraction (3/30)

I paid no attention as I focused my attention
On other things
Inside your space, outside your aura, around our shared environment
Your were...

....Invisible

I didn't see you
Weren't checking
Nothing
Blind

Our eyes met when I drew you in from my peripheral
Locked for a second
Then I looked away
To focus on my drink
My food
A convo with my homegirl
A text my guy sent me

But clearly you're interested

Ask for my name
Number
When you can take me out
All while giving me hugs
And stroking my hair
Complimenting my curves on my small frame
And smile

All the while I
Sip my mojito
Take a bite out of my hummus pita
Tell my homegirl I'm headed to the restroom
Respond to my guy's text

And bat an eyelash and smile and laugh at your
Small jokes
Attempts to get me interested
In you
Or at least, the "you" put on display

You ask if I have a guy, if I'm single at all
I don't deny, but to protect your game and ego I
Just nod my head slowly
With a passionate yet discreet, "and its getting serious" look on my face

I know I'm not interested
But
You know I'm entertained
You're a very brief, very temporary and thereby insignificant
Distraction

And I appreciate your efforts

But I've gotta take this phone call

He needs me....

Spoon-Fed (1/30)

I wanna write about you
But I'm right about you
Conflicts with my frontal as I battle a heart that'll bleed out its cavity
And onto the floor

Still, I...

....I wanna hold you
Mold you--through the dry spells where you break and I phlebotomize
I wonder and hypothesize
Not of the realness we possess but the tests given and the ratio of pass/fail
And margin of error

...United stand
Apart fall
Fell
Failed
Fail

Wait and anticipate a ringing sensation that isn't just orgasmic
But also beautifully tragic....

April's 30/30....

Wow! Its really been 3 month since I've posted here, huh? Fact is....aside from having so much going on, its also harder for me to write anything marginally good when everything in Life is going well. May not make much sense but I def work best when ubder pressure, when I'm "feeling some kinda way"...when I'm down out and depressed. For the most part, I've been too happy to construct anything "meaningful",but....

Its now springtime and April, which all translates to it being Poetry Month. So of course this means......New 30/30. I slacked terribly last time on the 30/30, but I'm going to put forth a greater effort this go round. Just watch.....

Ms_Slom :)

Free Prisoner (3/30)

She's a busybody
A self-proclaimed "SuperWoman"
She cooks, cleans, and takes care of others
She's talented, intelligent, and gifted
She holds a college degree and an important job and recently received a promotion for her efforts
She's got it all.

People compliment her striking outside beauty and take notice of her attraction within.
She's strong and willing
She's confident and a healthy mix of selfish and selfless
And people see...but they don't.

They see the masks she wears for the public eye
They see the time she takes out but don't realize its all part of a big lie
Yes she's all you think she may be
But at the same token, she's more
More than you've ever bargained for, from the bookkeeping of a reserved store

She's happy but not satisfied
Fulfilled in all aspects of life still seem to leave her with an empty soul
She's whole and complete and can stand on her own 2 feet
But something deep within leaves her unable to conquer the invisible and intangible feat.

Depression and Insomnia are 2 friends she has but never knew she needed
They show up at her mental doorstep every now and again
Unannounced and definitely uninvited
And always come w/a set of luggage she can never house
Yet they don't take a hint.

They'll leave when they're ready
Their favorite games are hide and seek, peek-a-boo and freeze tag
At times they play w/each other but never without her
Against her will

She's a prisoner still.
Of the free variety.

insomnia: Redux

(This is Part 2 of my Insomnia poem I posted here a while ago).....I am also participating in a 30/30 w/one of my friends + a group of other writers. In addition, I'm presently posting this piece from my SlimBerry. We'll see how this goes :). Enjoy!


Insomnia: Redux!

Dammit!

I'm still--
Nocturnally unbalanced and unfulfilled
My mind's clouded and reeled
Going back and forth between my mental and reality-----How do I deal?

.....Adequately?
Or at least at a sufficient pace?
Or speed--not to fast to reach an irreversible mode of insanity but just quick enough to erase

Or temporarily put to rest
The things on my mind that's heavily weighing
During the wee hours as I'm constantly contemplating
The equation that's to measure and equal my thoughts [divided by] sleep [to equal] me being at my best

But as I can attest
I tend to reach a 'peak' or 'prime' or 'record best'
When my body's a bit weary, my mind's busy and fried, there's a million things for me to do, and I'm stressed beyond deny

They say sleep keeps us functioning and up to speed
I say I've never really claimed the "Normalcy"
...Of those "theys"--couldnt sympathize with those needs
I'm "weird" and Insanity's a friend of mine
Genius is my homie and the trio of us is quite divine....

Beautiful Lie

Beautiful Lie........

Written: 16 Aug 2009

He sees a promising "us"
A world inspired by much
Encompassed in little to no fuss
A life treated with delicate care and a tender touch
And all the embodiments of a life complete:
Love
Support
Trust

It's his "us"

She feels her connection with him is real
The flame ignited between the two of them is all she can truly feel
She moves forward and continues to progress in life but it's only for him would she retreat and reel...
...back to him if he leaves or they part off their much complicated emotional wheel
Her heart is locked to all, but for him, it's unlocked and open for him to steal

When the mirrors are removed and the smoke clears
The mental unclogs and the picture unsmears
What seams far fetched and distant is brought to the forefront, out from the rear

Our own perceptions can take over reality, filling our own heads with lies
Lies so beautiful we can't trust our own minds
The truth is plan to see but our brains make it a near impossibility

If we trust our eyes we'll see that Life's truth isn't far away, tucked down, or left behind
It's oftentimes right in front of our faces; we just can't be afraid to explore what lies inside the depth of our eyes versus the desire hidden within the back of our minds


Mal S

War of Worlds...with no "L"

War of Worlds...with no "L"





It's a contradiction

Flip it inside out and change my diction

Can't be afraid to spit due to possible verbal friction

Only the scared and fearful chose not to take such a position



L.Boogie and Jay have the ability to call out the Lost Ones

And you can do it too; just let your pen be your Top Gun

No pun…load the ammo and spit fire with words stung

And by the time the song stops, you'll be finishing up a new one.



In this war of worlds with no L

Take a step, look again and what's it spell?

Words—flows, prose, written rhythmic rhymes

Say it slow, at mid-tempo, or fast three times



Work at it, use your mental, and aim to sublime

Wanna win in this war, you can't afford to fall too far behind



With a lack luster piece

That took far too much ease

And is devoid of a steady beat

With wack lines like rhyming heat with…heat



War of words—a steady mental fight

If it's your dream, make sure it takes flight over plight

Never give up before your might sees the light

You have a brain so use it; you have that right.